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How do you feel???
f
31 December 2005 18:27
Hello everyone;
i dont know how to present this subject without giving wrong impressions smiling smiley
but here it goes.
Does anyone here has bad memories about their homeland that is preventing you from going back there??? and if so how do you deal with that???
Thanks for your help

Best wishes on the new year.

May all your dreams come true.

The times may seem dark & gloomy... but I know I have it on me, to make it to brighter days --- never lose hope Diminished Ovarian Reserve FSH: 5.7 LH: 2 17-06-2009: C3 ultrasound 7 antral follicules
s
31 December 2005 18:58
Slaam
You did a good job expressing your point!
I feel very sad and very angry at myself and my whole homeland bit. I ,among a lot of others, has made the choice to run away from the homeland. Searching for some peace of mind and relative comfort. Yet by being a transplant I feel non accpted where I am at, undisired, unwanted, and often pushed away and out out out. When such things happen I miss my home land I regret my choosing of exile and feel very angry with myself.I can not reverse my choice without causing a lot of pain to alot of people and therefore I live a half life a life of semi belonging.I find Hijrah very complex, and challenging.I recently run into a Morracan's psychologist's (Fathi ben Slama) writings and they have been helpful in giving me some perspective, peace of mind, and rest of the sole.Lonelyness could be a friend and solitude is a teacher.
Memories of injustice, flagrant mistreatement of people, autocratic systems,and corrupt social standards are like childhood immunizations ,that we got at home and hunt the subconscience until death. So the relationship with home is one of LOVE/HATE; I may miss some people, I may miss the olive trees, I may miss the sea, I may miss the sun set, I may miss the food, I may miss the call for prayers, I may miss the dusty road to the country side ... And feel sad or on a good day may be even cry, write a poem... I definetly don't miss Police brutality, ignorant political misleaders,and narrow minded religious icons.
Egnough for now. I love being who I am. Even when I am suffering.
f
31 December 2005 20:10
that's exactly how i feel, sometimes i feel very home sick, wishing if things could have been slightly different but right after that feeling of home sickness i find myself going back to the many bad things that have happened to me there the many disappointements, the hurts, the rejections ... etc i can go on and on and i ll never find the end of the list. i feel sad when i think that i m the one paying the price, the only thing that hurts me more is my parents i want to be by their side see them and sometimes i feel a great need of my mom's hug and encouraging words but i say it is ok i can do this just be patient and hopefully one day i ll forget and forgive.

The times may seem dark & gloomy... but I know I have it on me, to make it to brighter days --- never lose hope Diminished Ovarian Reserve FSH: 5.7 LH: 2 17-06-2009: C3 ultrasound 7 antral follicules
a
3 January 2006 11:57
is very sad to know people having some real bad feeling about the homeland, I was like you guys having some rage! why should we have to go through a lot to just have a regular life and i find out. homeland has nothing to do with that, the reason so many Moroccan have made it there incl our parents. i guess is just our expectation was to high.

so many thing i did not care less about, the first years of live in europe. This Ramadan was hard on me, and The upcoming of EID Alkabir is really eating my patient. i never missed Morocco or the familly as much as i do this periode. cause of work cant make the trip, just have to deal with it.

my conserne is why now after 13 years,it really bother me. I even think sometime is it now i am feeling mature, or is it my reproche to Allah that have make me take things very serious.

I wish we all find, the happiness we came looking for..
I wish new year will bring the light and hapiness in every Moroccan and muslims heart..

My Allah bless us all.

aziz_dk
p
5 January 2006 01:24
At first we all felt the same , anger ,rage ...........but with time with all or some of us at least started to make a difference between homeland & peoples action & what they could & did get away with.
I think it was & still is in some peoples interest that we all feel enranged about our homeland & keep away from it so they could enjoy it for them selves.
I do agree with what's being posted so far ,but we have to direct our rage ,anger ...to the people causing it & not stop us going back & trying to change ,move & influence things !

As they say the only way is up lets all hope that 2006 will a start ,with 2007 being a year when the expat could vote & are allowed to take part in the election , i know we still have a long way to go but lets start .
It does hurt & anger me more to see others enjoying life back home when most of us live in exile !
I
6 January 2006 15:53
hi

all what i can say about your topic is that even if we're not usually satisfied when we go back tu our homeland but we return all the time there cause we can't ignore neither our homland nor our traditions


i think
f
7 January 2006 04:50
Mme Brunnette
that is my main concern ..... i dont want to go there even for a visit .....and that worries me .... i know someone who has never put her feet in her homehald for over 15 years and i m scared that i m getting to that point as well.
The times may seem dark & gloomy... but I know I have it on me, to make it to brighter days --- never lose hope Diminished Ovarian Reserve FSH: 5.7 LH: 2 17-06-2009: C3 ultrasound 7 antral follicules
a
7 January 2006 18:29
fabaraw a écrit:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mme Brunnette
> that is my main concern ..... i dont want to go
> there even for a visit .....and that worries me
> .... i know someone who has never put her feet in
> her homehald for over 15 years and i m scared that
> i m getting to that point as well.


I dont know why you are so scared about taking that step. i know your feelings but u should know that you are different person now and people and the land you left for many years ago have changed.

if we all keep just the bad memories we never advance in life.
I have feeling that changes that happend to us abroad, can at less give us the straight to forgive those who have trait us bad.

leave the past behind you and start from fresh give the homaland and people at chance..to show you they have changed

best wishes to u all
aziz_dk
 
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